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The Ruttle Report - If I had a million dollars...well, make that 80!

"You know the lyrics: 'If I had a million dollars, I'd be rich!'"
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The lottery is a fascinating thing, isn't it?

Each week, what has to be hundreds of thousands of Canadians throw down $6 or $10 to buy a ticket on either the Lotto Max or the Lotto 6/49 jackpot, in the hopes that maybe, just maybe, their numbers will be called and the next logical step is picking out just how big they want their dream house with all the bells and whistles, as well as buying a fleet of new vehicles to pick and drive depending on what mood they may be in that day.

Many Canadian kids, especially Western Canadian kids grew up with parents who subjected themselves to the "idiot tax", the term coined for suckers who actually think they have a snowball's chance in Hell of actually winning the lottery. Hey, my parents played the 6/49 every week, especially my dad.

I remember as a young kid hopping in the van to go with him on Saturday morning drives over to Outlook so that he could check his tickets and get a few pairs of new ones for that weekend's draw. Man, that guy was dedicated. I don't think Jack Ruttle ever thought he had a chance at striking oil with any random ticket on any random weekend, but I guess in his own way, Dad was a dreamer. He woke up early every day, went to work, came home, raised his kids, took care of his horses, and then he'd go back to bed, rinse and repeat the very next day.

If there was ever a man who deserved to win it big, it was my dad.

All these years later and hordes of people are still buying lottery tickets, with the "racket" not appearing to dry up anytime soon. Pop over to the D&E convenience store here in Outlook on a Friday or Saturday morning and you're going to see the last few people drop by to pick up their tickets for that weekend's draws.

And for good reason lately, as the Lotto Max jackpot has reached staggering numbers. The main jackpot prize is a blockbuster *$80 million, and now there are 29 draws for the MaxMillions prize, meaning there are now 29 chances to win a prize of $1 million. In total, that makes *$109 million in cash prizes up for grabs for any uber-lucky Canadian who may have been born with a silver horse shoe stuck up their backside.

*$80 million. Wow. What a number.

( * = AUTHOR'S NOTE: This column was written before Tuesday's Lotto Max draw, in which two people from Alberta and Quebec ended up winning the big $80M jackpot. 'If only it was me', huh people? Oh well.....)

There's a lot of griping going on in our country these days about the price of, well, EVERYTHING and even more woes about our tax system, but in the event that you ever become one of those very, very, very, very, very select few who wind up buying a lottery ticket and winning 'The Big One', then you're absolutely set for life.

That's not exactly how it is for our neighbors to the south. In the U.S., lottery winnings are taxed, and the same goes for any other kind of prize money won by someone. It kind of makes the elusive Powerball winnings seem like a cruel joke. Oh sure, you'll be winning hundreds of millions, but you'll also be severely taxed and you can watch as your prize winnings go to Uncle Sam. And do you ever watch game shows on network television? That woman who won $50,000 and a new car on Wheel of Fortune will be lucky if she gets to keep $30-35K after taxes, and I'm sure there are also some fun conditions to winning a vehicle that you have to uphold. That man who won the big $250,000 grand prize on that show The Floor might be taking home $175K if he's lucky.

At least here in Canada, when you win the lottery, you're presented with one of those novelty big checks that you pose for a photo with, and then you're given a real check totaling all of your prize money, and it's tax-free. Imagine - just imagine! - 小蓝视频 given a check for $80 million and then walking into your local RBC or Scotiabank. The smiles those people must have probably don't leave their faces for weeks on end.

So, the question remains - what would you do with such a gargantuan prize amount? Well, some ideas come to my mind....

First off, Tears Central. I mean, I would cry for hours on end with tears of just sheer joy. Following that, as well as any official phone calls to make and i-dotting and t-crossing to be done, I guess my next step would be to announce my retirement at the age of 39. What a world, huh?

From there, I would buy residential lots here in Outlook to establish the location of my future dream home, and I would drive up north to Candle Lake and do the same thing; buying lakefront property that would one day house my dream vacation home.

As well, I'd be very giving with my winnings. As a journalist in this local area for the past 17 years, I've seen a lot of good 小蓝视频 done by a long list of community groups and organizations in places like Outlook, Conquest, Dinsmore, Elbow, Lucky Lake, Beechy, and probably a dozen or so more. So some funds would definitely be headed their way. And of course, my family would benefit as well. I have six siblings, and I wouldn't think twice about giving each of them a check for $1 million, no strings attached. Have some debt you want to clear off? Maybe a new home you've been looking at? Buy them! Life's short!

One of the things I'd be very interested in doing with such a windfall of money is coming up with ways to honor my late parents, like perhaps a bursary or a grant to students leaving high school who are interested in pursuing a career in health care or working with horses and livestock. As well, my dream home would feature a number of things that would pay tribute to the departed Jack and Lynda, like a room dedicated to generations of horse racing and a garden featuring my mom's portrait and namesake.

It's fun to dream about this kind of stuff, isn't it? And then we fantasize about it all becoming a reality when we plunk down our few bucks and buy a ticket, week after week.

At the end of the day, if I ever struck that elusive oil and a proverbial gold mine was coming my way, I'd just be thinking of one man and what he'd want me to do with all that money.

Whatever I'd do, I'd do it for you, Dad.

For this week, that's been the Ruttle Report.

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