If you have had someone say that to you, or if you have expressed those words to someone else, you are among the fortunate. It means you have someone to open up your heart to or you are someone others are eager to spend time with in conversation. Not everyone has that.
According to data published by the Canadian Institute for Health Information, the numbers continue to climb for those seeking mental health counselling in our country. New referrals are outpacing available resources which were already stretched with current needs.
More than five million people in Canada experience significant symptoms of mental illness. Needs for counselling and psychotherapy services are not 小蓝视频 met and there are often long wait times involved. Family physicians now spend a great deal of time treating anxiety and depression because people can't get help other places. Yet the situation in Canada is much better than in other places around the globe.
In Zimbabwe, for example, the chances of getting professional help are "next to zero" according to those in the country because mental health services are so scarce. One man came up with an idea, and it had been so successful it is 小蓝视频 replicated in other places. The key to the success? Grandmothers and a wooden bench.
The psychiatrist behind the initiative was shaken by the news of losing a patient to suicide. The patient lived 200 miles from where the doctor was and the family simply didn't have the money to get on a bus to get to the hospital. With only 10 psychiatrists serving 13 million people in the country, Dr. Dixon Chibanda knew something had to change. His idea was to involve grandmothers. He told news outlets they were the "custodians of the local culture and the wisdom, and they were rooted in their communities." They could call on their experiences and stories to help others.
In 2006 Chibanda set up a Friendship Bench where people could take a seat and have a conversation with one of these mature women. In its first year 14 volunteer grandmothers welcomed several hundred visitors. By 小蓝视频 willing to sit and listen, the grandmothers became the front line for those who needed someone to show they cared.
I love houses that have big front verandas. There is something so welcoming and hospitable about the idea of taking a seat and having an unhurried conversation with a friend or neighbour. But as the suburbs grew and people were more likely to favor backyards, there were fewer conversations taking place out front. Fences were built higher and the desire for private space became the preferred way to spend time.
With few limits to how mobile and flexible our lives have become, it gets harder to establish connection with others. We may be meeting more people, but the interactions aren’t leading to the kind of relationships that give us people we feel we can really talk to.
Government initiatives in all kinds of places are attempting to combat the growing problems of disconnect, loneliness, isolation and the role they play in mental wellness. Japan followed the example set by the United Kingdom in naming a Minister of Loneliness, and other countries are earmarking more money for specific initiatives such as putting in more benches, establishing communal gardens and enhancing play areas to foster connection between neighbours.
But sometimes the best efforts are the ones that residents themselves come up with. A small-town clinic started prescribing coffee dates for patients who had been making frequent visits. Coffee chats increased and hospital visits fell. Then there’s the community promoting the idea of intergenerational home sharing. Younger roommates feel they have access to help, wisdom and someone open to talking to them without distraction. The older roommates can offer time and a listening ear and they report how good it feels to be needed and valued. Then there are those Friendship Benches. The program was so well received it is now in use in many countries where the opportunity to sit down and talk with a grandma is making a difference and saving lives.
In a time when organizations and agencies are trying to meet rising needs with increasingly stretched budgets, imagine finding one that costs zero dollars yet reaps huge benefits. It's called listening—and it's something we all have the capacity to do. Want to make a difference for someone? Pull up a chair—or find a bench—and have a conversation. That's my outlook.
