The other day I went to the gym. I hadn't tied my shoes beforehand, something I usually do, nor had I been in the newly renovated gym in the Leisure Centre. Fortunately for me, there was a wrinkly, orange leather chair sitting by the door. An odd place for a chair, I thought, but as I didn't feel like kneeling to tie my laces, the chair seemed like a good option. With much gusto, I threw myself into the seat, assuming that I would sink slightly into the chair's wrinkly and obviously worn-out cushion. Imagine my surprise when the chair put up quite a bit of resistance, and actually stood up. For this had not been a chair at all, but rather two 40-year-old women who had somehow managed to achieve the same shade of orange in their skin, blending seamlessly together. Extremely embarrassed, I apologized profusely, trying to explain how I had mistaken them sitting together for a worn-out arm chair.
They seemed unconcerned and laughed off my apology, saying that this hadn't been the first time one of them had been sat on in a public place. They walked out discussing their upcoming thirty minute tanning sessions, while I stood there blushing like crazy, still not wearing my runners.
OK, I admit that much of this story was falsified. For one, and probably the most obvious, I've never stepped foot in the newly remodelled version of the Leisure Centre gym.
But the over-tanned women who at first glance resembled orange furniture are only slightly exaggerated. The fact that exposure to the ultraviolet radiation found in suntan beds causes premature wrinkling and aging of skin is, however, completely true. This constant exposure can also cause skin cancer, mutate DNA, and harm the immune system. Summed up, suntan beds make you look like a wrinkly old chair, and what's going on inside your body isn't much better.
I, as a pasty white person, understand the appeal of dark, healthy looking skin. One only needs to briefly look at my family to see how good a person can look with a bit of a tan. And I'm guilty of hitting the tanning bed myself before heading on tropical vacations, and before graduating from high school. Obviously I, and many others like me, have taken the risks associated with suntan beds.
It's the constant tanning, the addiction, that freaks me out. I have better things to do with my time than spend 30 minutes killing my body while simultaneously giving myself the appearance of an oompa loompa. I can roll in a bag of Doritos for quite a bit less money, and with fewer health effects.
So crawl out of your tanning beds before it's too late. There are enough cancer-causing agents floating around to worry about without purposely subjecting yourself to them. Also, I would prefer to age somewhat naturally, develop wrinkles because of life experiences and adventures, rather than look like I'm 19 than 30. Gross.
