When a loved one dies, there is little anyone can say or do to take away the pain of separation and the sorrow of that passing. Sometimes all we can do, as a leading theologian put it, is to put our mouths to the dust and wait for time and God to heal us. Friends and family can support us, often in silence.
But as Christians we know in our hearts that there is more; that the parting is not forever, and that the loss has grace attached to it.
Fr. Brendan McGuire of Holy Spirit Parish in San Jose, California, says, "One of the great privileges for priests is to celebrate funeral Masses; it may not seem like a privilege or a grace, but it really is.
In those very fragile and vulnerable moments, we can celebrate the gift of a person's life and bring our faith and hope to a crystallized reality in our lives.
McGuire says the funeral liturgy is centered on the Mass of Thanksgiving; it is a Mass where we celebrate the person's life and offer thanksgiving to God for all that he has given to us in and through this person in particular.
One part of the funeral liturgy that is particularly beautiful is called the "Song of Farewell." As Catholics, we believe that when a person dies, the soul of that person is met by the angels and the saints; those angels and saints then present that soul to God.
This Song of Farewell says in part:
May flights of angels lead you on your way
To paradise, and heaven's eternal day!
May martyrs greet you after death's dark night,
And bid you enter into Sion's light!
May choirs of angels sing you to your rest
The angels and saints come to meet this person, to hold her, and to present her to God Most High. It is a beautiful song and it is a beautiful image of presenting the person to God Most.
Shakespeare was familiar with this rite in Hamlet with Horatio's final words to Hamlet: "Good-night, sweet prince, / And flights of angels sing thee to thy rest!"
It will be 40 years this year since my father was born to eternal life, and my mother followed three months later. I can remember the numb pain of loss we felt at the funerals. But hope balanced that sorrow.
Since then, their influence has remained. Many times over the years I have given thanks, remembered and asked their intercession in prayer. Yes, the saints can intercede for us.
Death is not the end but a change. Our loved ones who precede us will continue to influence us in profound ways. We know that sometimes the veil between heaven and earth is very thin. At times we find ourselves very close to those who have gone before us to show us the way. More than once I've had to say, "Thank you dad," and "thank you mom."
